by professor Itzic Hurban from the linguistic department, University of Ben-Haifa.
Introduction: I was sitting in Harrods in Knightsbridge, London, and having high tea, caviar little
sandwiches, when a group of probably women dressed in cute black dresses and
nice expensive Burqas passed by. It reminded me immediately my obligations
here: give lectures in London colleges about the Apartheid Israel. Tonight I am
at Hammersmith college and you are invited, it is across the new mosque,
everybody knows where the mosque is. Just ask, yes, in English or Arabic. But life
is good, money coming in (from Ford Foundation, don't tell). So this is my
advice to you my friends if you want to be as successful as I am.
1.Be sure to start by suggesting that every bad thing that happened in
Palestine is due to the Israeli Jews. "We are guilty" declare, the
Palestinians are our victims. We missed the peace offers, we preferred to killed
Palestinian children, not that we wanted to drink their blood, this is an old
2. Denounce Zionism, the racist Apartheid
organization. The word "Zion" should be removed and replaced by the word
Palestine. The Old Testament should be corrected. Zion should be replaced by
"Palestine." "On the rivers of Iraq we sat and cried when we remembered the
atrocities that were done by the Israeli .."-Psalms 120:1-7. With Hanukah (Naqba 1)
we have to tell the truth about the Maccabbis, the IDF, the fight was illegal
since it did not take into consideration that Muslims 600 years later will
have a claim about Jerusalem.
3. Publish the fruit of your wisdom in foreign journals,
preferably English, there are many to choose from. The articles have to be very long,
the longer the more wisdom. Factoids should be a major part of the article. You do
not have to tell the truth, the believers do not care about the truth if you support their
dogma. Publish only in journals that do not allow criticism, letters to the editor
and alike. You know that the hundreds of factoids that lace your article
cannot all be challenged and if they are they put the critic on defense or in an
apologetic mood. This is a fascist practice and if it worked for them why
should it not work for you.
4. Palestinians never did anything wrong. They
resisted the occupation and if they exploded buses or pizza parlors or launched
missiles on civilians it is because of the occupation. Yes, the occupation
of Tel-Aviv, Netanya and others by the Zionists. Develop a tunnel vision that
will allow you to see better the Israeli war crimes ignoring Palestinian
crime (any how, how could these nice Arabic people do bad things?)
5. Get in touch with European, American and Arab
activists and tell them that you are an Israeli Jew who denounce the Zionist
Apartheid government. This truly will legitimize you.
6. Lastly, you have to compare Israeli to Nazis. This is a must.
After all Hitler was a good man who did not know exactly that Himler and Eichman are
killing Jews. Yes, he wrote it in his "mein Kampf" but he really did not mean it. As
president Ahmadinejad said, not only Jews were killed, and if they were killed, a
subject to be researched by him, than they were not 6 millions. Probably
6,000 were killed. This is not a reason why European Jews should come to
Palestine in 1948. I am very convinced that the Jews from Europe and Arab countries
could have gone to Brooklyn. There are so many of them there anyhow. The ideas
of Uganda, Madagascar were not bad either.
7. Last, last. Tell your English friends that you do not mind
that they invaded Maoria (and called it New Zealand), that they conquered
Australia, Canada the USA from their Aborigines and American Indians. There is no
parallel for conquering those countries for a "Lebensraum," space for living,
food, industry. Jews did the same in the same period of time but not for a
"Lebensraum," but because their history, Bible and prayers. You tell the English,
the French the Belgians that you don't care about their justified atrocities.
It is only Israel that made it's to do crimes. Suddenly, suddenly
there was a big boooooom. Out of the earth rise the Jewish pilgrims, workers
and refugees. They died of malaria, famine of war. They turned the desert into
a garden and built Universities. They were exploded, killed, tortured and
maimed. The Jewish soldiers whose blood soaks the land after so many wars. The
127 Israeli children and their mothers, grand mothers. They lie in their
graves silently but not for long. They may wake up and scream:" We gave you this
small piece of land, the freedom, the liberty with our blood with our life.
Don't abuse it, don't kill us twice."
Prof. Itzic Hurban can be reached with E-mail _Driheart@aol.com_ (mailto:Driheart@aol.com)
P.s. Dear friends, money is not a problem: I am paid a
salary by my Ben-Haifa U. with all the fringe benefits. I do not know why they
pay, but they do: I do not teach my curriculum, but my students have the
benefit of knowing my progressive ideas on Israel. This is what I am doing when
I am there, mostly I am not there, I have vacations, Sabbaticals and time for
research. I do those in the college across the new Mosque in London. In
Israel I use my class to teach real life to my students. Not that they will have
a profession, but they will be excellent anarchists. Is it not the reason
that their parents sent them to Ben-Haifa University? N.B. Not only
parents pay us money. Guess what? Israel is financing our University too! Don't
worry, my friends, Israel will never check what we are teaching. Interestingly,
in Bir Zeit University a Hamas representative is sitting in every class. He
wants education I presume.